So, I walked into work today and I swear you could have killed a damn dung beatle it smelled so bad in that place. It literally smelled like someone had set a pile of shit covered shoes on fire and then tried to put the fire out by pissing on them. A couple of people I am sure will call in sick after having to smell all that burnt plastic all day long. I know my friend Sathara is not coming in, he was one of the first people in the building and he got the worst of the smells yesterday. I am just so thankful that the fire stayed where it was because we have hydrogen and amonia tanks all over that building not to mention the natural gas lines. So if it would have gotten out of control there would have no job to come back to today.
Well here's the information I have so far to give you and as soon as I get a damage estimate I will post that:
From what I was told by security the fire started at around 12:10pm yesterday. Crews were dispatched from I believe station 10 right by the airport and when they arrived they could not see any sign of fire. We have one of the most secure buildings in the entire valley due to what we have inside. So by just looking at the outside no one can tell what's going on inside. Once our security staff arrived they came inside and found heavy smoke coming from our "wet area" which is were we store some chemicals and do some industry specific tasks. By the time fire/resuce arrived the second time the fire was smoldering itself out and had been almost extinguished by the sprinkler system. A hazmat team had to be called out to the site after people started complaining about their eyes burning.
That's all I know for now about the fire. Hopefully at tomorrows team meeting I will get more information.
Now for of course the really boring stuff. The part where I get to sit here and tell you about me. I miss my ex girlfriend Amanda, and I am trying to do everything in my power to get back with her. I know that I was never perfect, but who really is? I have never really openly talked about her before, because I was so very afraid to lose someone I cared about so much. I love her with all my heart, and we have had some rough spots through our time together but I always believed that we came out of them stronger for each other. Sometimes in life you have to let go of someone you love and hope they will come back if they loved you just as much.
Well I am having a hard time trying to let go of her and I don't think that time will make it easier for me to just walk away from someone who has meant so much to me, and done so much for me as a person. She tells me she wants to be friends right now while we work through our differences but what that could mean scares me. I am terrified she will start dating other guys or worse. She tells me that's not what she wants right now, but at the same time she's not sure what she wants. She tells me not to worry about, but am I wrong to think she may find comfort in the arms of another man? I mean am I totally crazy?
The more she tells me she wants to be friends right now, the more I realize me treating her like a friend may have hurt us. I think about things I've said and done to her and around her and realize that is no way to treat someone you love. I tell my friends how I was around her and they tell me "well that's how you treat everyone." Well, that's where I went wrong; the love and respect is there for her, but I became so comfortable with her in my life I forgot who she was to me and just treated it more like a very selfish friend instead of the mutual relationship it should have been.
I know what my mistakes are, I know how to fix them. I would like for nothing more then to have this work, I would literally move to where she is and sleep in a park (I know your thinking "wow this guy is a creep" but our physical distance has always been an issue.) I am willing to do any and everything I need to do to make it right again. If I could measure my love for her and my commitment to trying to make this work in grams of gold (31.1 grams is an ounce, an ounce of gold is $982 today) I would have enough money to solve world hunger, end global debt and poverty and still have enough left over to never want again. But is that enough, I ask myself? Is putting everything on the line, risking everything for a chance to fail worth it? I think it is, I think I would rather die trying to salvage my relationship with her then to just walk away and say "Well Matt, better luck next time." Good night everyone.
M
~te quiero mucho, no lo olvides. Mehs.
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